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Sirius XM gives Dr. Laura her “First Amendment” rights back

Good news for unmarried women who like being called “whores” because they live with their boyfriends. Dr. Laura Schlessinger has signed a contract to appear exclusively on Sirius XM satellite radio. Her now defunct over-the-air radio show had been syndicated on the service since 2005.

“Coming to SIRIUS XM is an amazingly freeing transition from terrestrial radio for me. Satellite radio is a forum where a diverse group of people get to speak their minds without fear,” declared Schlessinger in a Sirius press release. “I can’t wait to preach, teach and nag about morals, values, ethics and principles. My brain is buzzing with new ideas for my program’s content, direction and expansion, including guest interviews with people who intrigue and inspire me. I couldn’t be more giggly if you tickled me!”

God knows what Dr. Laura sounds like when she giggles. Last time she got a little loose, she ripped off the N-word about a dozen times to a black caller.

The resultant uproar had advertisers for her terrestrial program scrambling to get out. Schlessinger then quit the airwaves and told Larry King that “I don’t have the right to say what I need to say. My first amendment rights have been usurped.”

As Radio Survivor’s Paul Riismandel noted at the time, this formulation was a bit peculiar. “Rather, what happened to Dr. Laura is that she felt the harsh sting of the marketplace at work,” he wrote.

“One has the right to say just about anything she likes, in nearly any forum, and the government has very few Constitutionally valid reasons to either stop the speech or punish the speaker. But that right to free speech does not mean the speaker cannot be held accountable by others for what she says and the venue where it’s said.”

Let’s see how Sirius XM handles Schlessinger now. The fun starts on  January 3. Dr. Laura will air live Monday—Friday from 2:00 – 5:00 pm ET on SIRIUS XM Stars (SIRIUS channel 102 and XM channel 155).

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